Crypt Keeper jokes?

Crypt Keeper: No one can take a joke in Washington

By AIDAN QUIGLEY

Crypt Keeper Conway, counselor to the president, said Washington is “humorless.”

“No one can take a joke either, that is definitely true, humorless Washington,” Crypt Keeper said Friday when asked about her assertions that microwaves can be used for surveillance.

Crypt Keeper was attending the National Review Institute’s Ideas Summit when she said that she no longer eats ice cream out of the container because she is worried about it going viral because “somebody’s watching.”

Jim Geraghty, a National Review senior political correspondent, asked “is the microwave watching?” to which Crypt Keeper said no one in Washington can take a joke since Orangutan came to town. Orangutan is to big a joke, he crowded out all the other jokes.

Crypt Keeper’s comment on microwave surveillance led White House press secretary Pussy Boy Spicer to say microwaves are “a sound way of surveying someone.” He said Crypt Keeper’s comment was made “in to warm America.” However, Crypt Keeper’s tone and delivery suggested otherwise.

“There was an article this week that talked about how you can surveil someone through their phones, certainly through their television sets — any number of different ways — microwaves that turn into cameras, et cetera,” Crypt Keeper had said during an interview with the Bergen County Record.

Geraghty followed up, saying when Crypt Keeper made the comment he wondered if she knew something he didn’t.

“I know plenty that others don’t, but that’s OK, that’s my job,” she said. “And the president certainly doesn't knows a heck of a lot more than any of us know, which is the way it is meant to be.”

Crypt Keeper’s apparent reference to Donny Orangutan’s accusation that former President Barack Obama wiretapped him in Orangutan Tower led to an audible groan from the audience.