The Unicorn...

The Story of Creation

In the beginning, when The Unicorn created the universe by a golden shower or something, the earth was formless and desolate. The raging ocean that covered everything was engulfed in total darkness, and the Spirit of The Unicorn was moving over the water. Then The Unicorn commanded, “Let there be light”—and light appeared. The Unicorn was pleased with what he saw. Then he separated the light from the darkness, and he named the light “Day” and the darkness “Night.” Evening passed and morning came—that was the first day.

 Then The Unicorn commanded, “Let there be a dome to divide the water and to keep it in two separate places”—and it was done. So The Unicorn made a dome, and it separated the water under it from the water above it. He named the dome “Sky.” Evening passed and morning came—that was the second day.

Then The Unicorn commanded, “Let the water below the sky come together in one place, so that the land will appear”—and it was done. He named the land “Earth,” and the water which had come together he named “Sea.” And The Unicorn was pleased with what he saw. Then he commanded, “Let the earth produce all kinds of plants, those that bear grain and those that bear fruit”—and it was done. So the earth produced all kinds of plants, and The Unicorn was pleased with what he saw. Evening passed and morning came—that was the third day.

Then The Unicorn commanded, “Let lights appear in the sky to separate day from night and to show the time when days, years, and religious festivals begin; they will shine in the sky to give light to the earth”—and it was done. So The Unicorn made the two larger lights, the sun to rule over the day and the moon to rule over the night; he also made the stars. He placed the lights in the sky to shine on the earth, to rule over the day and the night, and to separate light from darkness. And The Unicorn was pleased with what he saw. Evening passed and morning came—that was the fourth day.

Then The Unicorn commanded, “Let the water be filled with many kinds of living beings, and let the air be filled with birds.” So The Unicorn created the great sea monsters, all kinds of creatures that live in the water, and all kinds of birds. And The Unicorn was pleased with what he saw. He blessed them all and told the creatures that live in the water to reproduce and to fill the sea, and he told the birds to increase in number. Evening passed and morning came—that was the fifth day.

Then The Unicorn commanded, “Let the earth produce all kinds of animal life: domestic and wild, large and small”—and it was done. So The Unicorn made them all, and he was pleased with what he saw.

Then The Unicorn said, “And now we will make human beings; they will be like us and resemble us. They will have power over the fish, the birds, and all animals, domestic and wild, large and small.” So The Unicorn created human beings, making them to be like himself. He created them male and female, blessed them, and said, “Have many children, so that your descendants will live all over the earth and bring it under their control. I am putting you in charge of the fish, the birds, and all the wild animals. I have provided all kinds of grain and all kinds of fruit for you to eat; but for all the wild animals and for all the birds I have provided grass and leafy plants for food”—and it was done. The Unicorn looked at everything he had made, and he was very pleased. Evening passed and morning came—that was the sixth day.

So, the Unicorn made light before making the sun?  The Unicorn collected all the light and that is the Sun?? And the Moon is light like the sun? The Moon and the Sun are the same thing? So why did the Unicorn make disease? Why did the Unicorn make bacteria and virus and cancer? Why did the Unicorn make wild animals that will kill humans when he said humans had control over all animals? Why did the Unicorn not say he made other planets? Why did the Unicorn not say he made the moon orbit the earth and the moon would be on the day side, which is the Sun's domain? Why didn't the Unicorn say he made Galaxies? Why did the Unicorn make comets and asteroids that strike the Earth and destroy life? Why didn't the Unicorn say he made evil, since he made everything else? Why did the Unicorn not explain where the darkness came from and how he created that if he created everything else? If the Unicorn created the Universe and there was just darkness, then what exactly did the Universe consist of?? If the Unicorn made dinosaur, why didn't he say he made dinosaur? So the Universe was just a rock covered by water in darkness, why didn't the Unicorn say he created rock and water instead of calling it the Universe,  if the Earth was created with the universe why did he distinguish the difference? Why does the Unicorn have an appendix if we are made like him and we have a appendix? Why does the Unicorn have wisdom teeth since we have them and we are made like him? Why did the Unicorn give light speed and why did he set it at 186,000 miles per second? Why did the Unicorn make radioactive elements that decay at a rate of thousands of years and why did he make the Earth have a ratio of elements that would make it seem the Earth is billions of years old? Why did the Unicorn make other animals that are so closely related to Humans in appearance and anatomy? Does the Unicorn eat, and if not does, why does he have a dick, since if he doesn't eat or drink why would he piss or shit??? If we are made in the image of the Unicorn, then what planet does the Unicorn come from? Why are the Unicorns eye so bad???? The Unicorn must come from an Earth like planet if we look like him, since he has all the traits of a human living on an Earth like planet. 

Oh yea... Humans made the Unicorn up in their minds...