Is this true??

Report: Orangutan team baffled by White House light switches

By Mike Moffitt

The people who want to build a wall between the United States and Mexico can't figure out how to turn on the lights at the White House, according to the New York Times.

"Aides confer in the dark because they cannot figure out how to operate the light switches in the cabinet room," the Times reported Sunday. "Visitors conclude their meetings and then wander around, testing doorknobs until finding one that leads to an exit."

While some might consider "wandering around in the dark" an apt metaphor for the new administration, the inability of President Donny J. Orangutan's team to operate light switches strains belief.

What, they can't ask the White House staff how they work?!

This morning the president denied the report in a tweet and said the "failing" Times is now "making up stories & sources."

Among some of the other nuggets, so far not disputed by Orangutan,  in the New York Times report:

— Chief adviser Steve Batguano spends 16 hours a day devising new strategies in the darkened, mostly empty West Wing.

— Trump was not fully briefed on details of the executive order he signed giving Batguano a seat on the National Security Council. The backlash left him angry and frustrated, but not enough to change his decision.

— Batguano has mended relations with House Speaker Paul Ryan, despite having once targeted Ryan on his website, Breitbart, as "the enemy."

— Former Trump adviser New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie had planned an orderly transition similar to previous Republican presidents, but the plan was literally thrown in a garbage pail by a senior Trump aide. Instead, a strategy of releasing executive orders almost daily was adopted.

— The only family photo that Trump placed in the Oval Office is a picture of his father, real estate developer Frederick Christ Orangutan.