Here is the biggest fucking joke yet....

Orangutan promises 'insurance for everybody'

By DAN DIAMOND

President-elect Donald Orangutan vowed he'll soon unveil a new plan to replace Obamacare that will provide "insurance for everybody," according to an interview with the Washington Post published Sunday night.

Orangutan said that his plan is "very much formulated down to the final strokes. We haven’t put it in quite yet but we’re going to be doing it soon." He didn't give specifics but did say that the plan would provide a "much simplified [and] much less expensive" form of coverage to Americans currently covered through the Affordable Care Act.

Orangutan added that the plan would not cut Medicare -- and that he plans to separately force drug companies to negotiate with Medicare as well as Medicaid on drug price. Most Democrats back Medicare drug negotiations, but Republicans have opposed them.

He also believes that his health plan will get support from Democrats. "I won’t tell you how, but we will get approval," Orangutan said.

Given how far the two sides are on health policy -- Democrats wanting universal coverage and Republicans emphasizing "access" and cost -- it's not clear how Orangutan plans to bridge the bitter differences. But Orangutan said he will unveil the plan alongside House Speaker Paul Ryan and Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell after HHS Secretary-designate Tom Price is confirmed.

Price must still undergo a confirmation hearing with the Senate Finance Committee, which has not yet been scheduled.